Monday, April 4, 2011

Chores

I think chores are one of my failures as a father.

When I was growing up I did a fair bit to help around the house.   Karen and I took it in turns to set the table and dry the dishes when we were little tackers and during State School days I also had the job of cleaning and polishing everyones shoes before we left for school.

When I got old enough to use the lawn mower, I was pushing that around the yard once a fortnight and I can remember helping Mum paint the inside of the house or hang wall paper and one summer I painted the entire outside of the house perched up on a rickety home made ladder.

When Mum went back to work around the time I was finishing State School I also started to help with the interior house work, vacuuming and polishing the floors.  I don't remember being over taxed with any of that at the time, it was simply part of life and it earnt me some pocket money which I could then spend on comics.  It was a good deal.

But when I had my own kids I realise now that I probably made things a bit too easy for them.  I can't actually remember them helping me out off their own bat.  They helped sometimes when I asked but it always seemed a bit reluctantly.   So I failed them I think, by being weak and not insisting they pay their own way a bit more.

What about the rest of you?  If you have kids did they help out?   Was it something forced upon them or was it done with good grace and with a genuine desire to help you out?

5 comments:

JY said...

unfortunately we don't make our daughter do much either... perhaps we should make her do more??? same here... don't know...perhaps a little spoiled...

Anonymous said...

There is something in this generation of feeling "entitled" Entitled to everything and in an easy way.

As parents (and I am the same age as you Laurie with kids about the same age) we have had to battle the advertising creating a selfish attitide in our young. I think this has had a major influence.

I too have had unbelievable battles. I just came in to read the blogs with my cup of tea, after asking my daughter to pick up all her rubbish from the family room she had left there last night. I know it would have still been there after she leaves for School if I didn't say anything. There are clothes all over the bathroom, family room, etc. I actually have a dirty clothes basket in the bathroom, yet it must be such a task to open the lid and pop stuff in, or to walk the clean clothes back into each's bedroom.

The dishes are still in the sink from last nights dinner. Not once, does anyone jump up and do them after enjoying a meal. No wonder we get labled as nagging.

I try not to cave. I believe kids have to do their share. Yes, maybe it can be easy to say nothing and then clean up the mess ourselves, but is that really the answer? I don't think so... Gives them more of that 'me' entitlement. I am here to be waited on, I am here to be served... Nup... That is not preparing them for life.

Parents need to be united in parenting. They have to support what the other is trying to implement.

And yes, kids should and must have chores from a very early age. Picking up, feeding animals, sorting the washing, dishes, anything that is part of a family household.

Teenagers.... hmmmm... new sets of entitlements start happening. And a whole different ball game... But still you have to hope the boundaries and requirements you set when they are young come into play.

Jen

Jen said...

Test.

Loz said...

JY - sometimes the spoiling doesn't actually help

Loz said...

Jen totally agree. And I can't put my finger on the time when I went off track. Maybe it was just easier to avoid conflict for me. One of my many failings :)