I have finally realised that I cannot live my life for other people. That there comes a time when you actually have to put what you consider to be the right thing for yourself ahead of anything you may consider is the right thing for someone else. That may inevitably mean some hurt for some people.
But you cannot change other people, you only have the power to change yourself. And in recognising that you can also start to be that little bit selfish. I feel that I have lived according to what I thought was right for others, and as a consequence have worn the masks I've worn, and kept closed the doors I've closed, until I didn't even know what was right for me.
Time to be selfish for a while.